There are approximately 100 billion neurons in the brain. Each neuron has tiny branches coming off it that let it connect to many other neurons. When you were first born, your brain came with all the neurons it will ever have, but many of them were not connected to each other. When you learn things, the messages travel from one neuron to another, over and over. Eventually, the brain starts to create connections (or pathways) between the neurons and with repetition, these connections are strengthened. It’s like breathing: it just happens whether you think about it or not.
The only way to break a pattern that doesn’t serve you is to recognize it exists - even then it’s difficult to change. It takes real effort to bypass what’s been set with years of repetition.
Take a Detour
How many times have you driven on auto pilot, arriving at your destination with no memory of the journey?
You may start down a certain pathway of thought and before you know it, you arrive at your destination.
For example, you pass a coworker in the hall and smile a greeting. She looks at you with a blank stare and then knits her eyebrows. She doesn’t smile back or say hello. You’re a little surprised by the exchange. You’ve always gotten along well with the coworker and can’t imagine the reason behind her attitude. Where do your thoughts go from here?
A. You’re angry at her rude behavior and begin plotting your revenge
B. You’re concerned that you’ve done something to upset her
C. You wonder why everyone hates you and eat a Snickers so you feel loved
D. You shrug it off, certain the incident has nothing to do with you Destructive thoughts (or behaviors) may be triggered without your awareness. When you notice yourself traveling along familiar terrain, throw up a mental road block and search for an escape route.
Read Road Signs
Emotions are thoughts manifested. The best way to identify your thoughts is to acknowledge your feelings. External forces do not create or destroy your feelings. No one can make you angry, sad or happy. No thing can give you satisfaction, self esteem or respect. Think about the correlation between your thoughts and your feelings.
A. These people drive like maniacs. - > Anger, frustration
B. I should have called Kelly. -> Guilt, worry, lowered self esteem
C. I look so fat in this outfit. - > Shame, self loathing, disgust
D. No one appreciates me. - > Annoyance, self pity, hostility
Create your own examples and then rewrite the thoughts so they generate more positive feelings.
A. Thank goodness I’m a safe driver. -> Pride, patience, gratitude
B. I’m going to call Kelly. -> Purpose, friendliness, expectation
C. I’m a curvaceous babe. -> Attractive, beautiful, sexy, confident
D. Even if no one else notices, I ROCK! -> Accomplishment, pride
Take a new road and discover what the universe has to offer.
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