| Written by Lisa Hood,
on 02-19-2008 16:15
|
Views : 2796  |
Favoured : 69 |
Published in : , Motivation |
Tags : new car smell, spoiled brat, luxury cruise, unhappy state, material goods, loving family, new toy, leisure activities, benjamin franklin, dissatisfaction, digs, gratitude, blessings, two ways, happiness, imagination, acquisition, mistake, rsquo, vacations |
“There are two ways to increase your wealth. Increase your means or decrease your wants. The best is to do both at the same time.” Benjamin Franklin
If I find myself in an unhappy state, it may be because I am focused on what I lack, instead of what I have. Changing my mood from dissatisfaction to gratitude is usually as simple as flipping a switch. All I need to do is consider all the blessings in my life: a healthy, loving family, a warm and comfortable home, plenty of food (too much at times), clothing and income for leisure activities. I know that I am wealthy beyond imagination to 99% of the world’s population.
Occasionally, a stubborn four year old digs in her heels and demands a new toy.
“I deserve a new car. It’s not fair that everyone else can have a new car and not me.”
“I want to take a luxury cruise. How come everyone else can go on vacations and not me?”
“I want a cabin. I should be able to get away and relax on the weekend.”
Yes, she is a spoiled brat at times, but she’s my spoiled brat. I have learned to define my NEEDS versus my WANTS.
Once I know something is a WANT, I consider how much I’m willing to sacrifice to get it. I’m not willing to spend $30,000 for a new car, in addition to the increased cost of insurance, registration and maintenance. I will spend $50 to have my gently used vehicle detailed and the interior sprayed with New Car Smell.
If you find yourself in a similar funk, consider the following tips:
1) Avoid comparing yourself to others. You only see what others choose to show the world. It’s easy to assume everyone else is happy, satisfied and fulfilled, but you really don’t know the cost they have paid along the way.
2) Don’t mistake material goods for happiness or success. As long as you equate happiness with the acquisition of things, happiness will never arrive. There will always be something you do not possess, so there will always be a reason to by unhappy.
“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.” - Albert Camus
Another reason I may be feeling blue is if I’m investing myself in a project and losing perspective. A happy life requires balance between work and home, family and friends, our selves and others. For example, focusing only on our own wants and needs, we lose the opportunity to serve others and our world becomes a very small place. Once again, I am in charge of my own happiness. I simply need to reprioritize by activities to find balance and satisfaction in all areas of my life. A good tool for this is a Life Balance Pie Diagram.
Draw a circle and imagine it is a pie. Draw in the slices which represent the amount of time spent and level of satisfaction in each area: Career, Family, Friends, Health, Self Fulfillment, Spiritual Wellbeing, Community Service and Leisure. Does your drawing depict your priorities? Are you committed to Health, but devote little time to exercise or eating nutritious foods? If you notice an area that is out of balance, replace one or two action items on your to do list to build this area.
“The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” - Allan K. Chalmers
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